Zini, me & life in general

Archive for the ‘Thoughts’ Category


All my life lot of people have described me as bold or brave.. Which actually isn’t completely true.

As a child I was completely afraid of dark. It was so bad that I won’t go to bathroom alone, especially at my grandmother’s place which was situated by a river and bathroom was a little away from the drawing room. And then one day fed up by my fear, my mama turned off each and every light of the home and dropped me at the bathroom asked me to come back on my own and left!! I managed to come back alright 😉 and since then I somehow am not that afraid of dark 🙂

I am also a scaredy cat when it comes to watching horror and similarly scary movies. I generally avoid watching them. On the rare occasions I ended up watching them, I couldn’t sleep well for few days!! Even the funny Ramsay movies could do that to me, not to mention Friday the 13th and the evil. Oh I even got scared by watching Bhul Bhulaiya and The glass house, not exactly horror movies!!

But still people called me brave!! They said so because of my ability to stand up to anybody and speak my mind. I looked like someone who won’t take it lying down. In spite my general tendency of pleasing people, I voiced my opinion and spoke exactly what I thought for the things that really mattered to me. I also stood up for friends, which must have given the impression. I also appreciate this quality in other people. That explains why I was attracted to my husband. Some incidences at work place further bolstered this image.. I remember an office function for families where my super boss on meeting my parents for the first time told them that your daughter is very brave!!

But I want to tell that this is not exactly true!! There are other fears that I have apart from the ridiculous fears of dark and horror movies. I fear for my daughter’s safety. Every time she steps out of the house to go to school or to play, i have this little nagging fear in my heart. I know it is ridiculous!! She has to go out and win the world.. But isn’t it a bad bad world out there, especially this part of the world? You hear everyday about children getting abused and harmed. If a mother going to ATM in a crowded market at 8 pm with her child can be looted inside the ATM by showing gun to her child then how can I feel safe taking my daughter to the nearby park in same neighbourhood at 8 pm? If a friend can be looted of her precious chain in front of the society gate, how would I be able let my precious jewel go out alone? And all this in the so called safe area!! Does this mean that I have to restrict her (and mine) freedom too? Is stepping out without a car after dark a complete no-no for us now? Won’t my daughter know the joy of freedom the way I’ve known it? Won’t she get to ride that scooty and hang out with friends without worrying about time? Won’t she become independent, strong and brave, just the way I want her to be?

I know it’s too early to worry about. But I hope and pray my fears turn out to be false. I hope she truly becomes a brave person, someone who won’t cower in the face of adversity but would go out and fight it, however big or small it may be.

I am missing Ahmedabad today…


Can’t even think of a title!!

When I read my previous blog posts, I just can’t believe that I wrote them!! Some of them are so good and some of them are cringeworthy.. Still I wrote them. And today when I try to write a new post, I can’t even think of a title!!

While I am really proud of my previous posts, I wonder that is it possible that we somehow loose that creativity or ability to express ourselves in the written words? Because that is happening to me now a days. I can’t really articulate that well.. Is it because, there are too many things on my mind and there is no mind space for creative writing? I hope so.. After all writing a book is on my bucket list and it can’t be fulfilled if I can’t do some engaging writing..

So here I am, trying to brush it up.. Trying to reach out to that place in my mind that has gone in hibernation due to demands of work, commute, family and other persuits. Now that we are talking about other persuit, let me tell you more about it.. You may remember during my previous life as a stay at home mom, I started a baking business? I stopped it after I joined a full time job. But that keeda didn’t die down. It kept coming back to me. For the whole of last year I thought about it. I thought about learning baking professionally and doing it for the living. You may also remember that I was a student of youtube and various food blogs.. But to gain that confidence to put across that premium rate for my baked goodies, I had to go to the baking classes. So I paid a bomb (Thanks to my regular job) and did this baking course, where I mostly learnt about various cake decorating techniques. Some of them I knew but polished it there, some of the techniques were new to me and got a foundation to learn further. Most importantly I learnt to speak up and not to compromise. I realized that if I do that it won’t be fun anymore, it won’t be worth it.

And finally I took the plunge. I once again started baking professionally. If anything it has made my days much more hectic. But I am loving it.. I am loving this phase where I am just setting up the business. I love it when I get great feedback on the cake I had delivered. I love it when the kids come up to me and tell me that the cake I baked was awesome, or that my garlic breads are their most favorite thing in the world. It makes me happy when I see the awestruck faces of the children who can’t decide whether to play with the cake or to eat it, and when these little ones can’t keep their hands of these cakes!! I am not saying it has been all rosy.. I have had my share of mistakes, but thankfully they were far and few in between. And the customers, or friends who ordered have been sweet enough to show confidence in me and have ordered again. I love it when the people who ordered with me 4 years back, come back and order again as soon as they know that I have started the business again. I should count my blessings…

So ending this post with some of my recent creations.. Hope to be back soon..

You can keep track of my latest work on my food blog too at Cake n Curry.

I am back, again!!

If there is anybody in the world who can say I am back and then immediately disappear then it’s me.. But you know that already, I’ll tell you something that you don’t know – the reason(s) behind my one more magical disappearance and some other interesting (NOT) stuff from our lives..

I have been busy (nothing new you say?) but this time in a good way!! I’ve taken 6 baking classes for friends and neighbours, i.e. we have been baking cakes, breads and cookies. So after teaching the class I also had to work on preparing the class material. It was fun!! Those who learnt baking and their families loved the goodies and that makes me very happy!! A little positive feedback always boosts the morale 🙂

It was once again Zini’s vacation time!! Sometimes I wonder she is perpetually on vacation. There was winter vacation, then the term end vacation, then the summer vacation, then the navratri vacation, then the diwali vacation and finally we come back to the winter vacation!! In between there are some unplanned mini vacations, like election vacation (She is at home enjoying this vacation) .. Phew!! Why do the schools have to give so many vacations?! Why now? Why not when I was a student? Why?! Why?! Ok, so probably we don’t have answers to those questions… One of life’s mistries (or hard truth)?! The good news is that Zini’s formal school has finally started, the days of play schools are over and the uniform, school buses, lunch boxes and homework rule supreme in our lives. Not to forget early morning alarms… Thankfully she has already made a friend whom she was seen hugging and holding hands with yesterday.

The early morning alarms remind me of one more thing that has started occupying our mornings – Yoga.. Yes, once again we started doing yoga. Hopefully, we will be able to continue with the same rigor.

Oh BTW, you remember that post about one of those days? Finally it turned out I had carpal tunnel syndrome. That too kept me from blogging very regularly. I took an injection and already feeling much better. Though I can still do with some sleep (yeah, those early morning alarms robbing me of my precious sleep)..

So how have you been?

Mein Jyaada nahi maangti!!

Since my childhood I was sure in what kind of home I would like to spend my life!!

I always wanted my dream home to have a lot Hinchka (Jhoola/ Swings)!! And no, the regular Wooden or Metal hinchkas won’t do. They had to be paatiwala hinchka (they feel more like hammock) where I could sleep, eat and read!! And yes, it has to be situated near a river.

I also wanted to have a big garden with lots of mango trees of my own!! So that I can have loads and loads of mango in the season!! And also a swing under mango tree for those lazy summer afternoons, where I can read and sleep and listen to flowing water!!

As I grew up, more and more features started getting added to my dream home!! I didn’t want a big palatial home!! A home where everybody had their own space would be just fine!! But it had to be airy and well lit but not hot!! It has to have kind of laid back feeling to it!! So that you feel that you are on a permanent holiday!!

It also has to have a decent sized backyard where we can have a kitchen garden, preferably with a swing!!

And of course this home has to have a well stocked library once again with a swing where I would read my books lying down!!

Now that I have been bitten by baking and cooking bug, I would also prefer a big sunlit kitchen with a biiiig pantry to store all the exotic ingredients!! A built in oven in a modular kitchen would be just perfect!!

The home should be cool and shady in summers and warm in winters!! Probably I would also want a fireplace in living room!!

And no zatak colours for my home!! Subtle, pastel colours will be great on walls and the furniture has to feel like real wood!! And as I am a lazy ass, I would like Asian Paints guys to come over, move the furniture and my beloved swings, colour the rooms, restore everything including my beloved swings!! Thank you 🙂

You see, Mein Jyaada nahi maangti 🙂

So what’s your dream home like?

Birthday updates..

Thankfully today too I don’t have to think about what to write, I’ll write about how my birthday was  🙂

-Zini refused to believe that it was mumma’s b’day!! She only wished me when her friend wished me!!

– The day started with lots of phone calls. My parents, my brother, my masi, my friends, hubby’s aunts, my friends from previous jobs all called up!! I really don’t know what good I’ve done to get such great people in my life while I always forget everybody’s birthday..Yeah my peanut sized memory and all..

-After contemplating a lot, I finally decided to make vedhami!! And it was awesome, I dare say almost like mom made vedhamis!! Though I made less than half of what mom used to make, it took almost an hour of strictly continuous stirring to get the stuffing ready!! How mom did it for more than two hours just to make me happy is beyond me!! And we are not even talking about violent nature of this batter when heated!! Tomorrow will be the recipe post 😉

– All your wishes made my day!! My social media pages and groups were filled with birthday wishes!!! Every time I receive a wish I am truly touched!! Thanks again!!

– In the evening hubby came home with a cake, which he tried in vain to hide. My friends to came home to wish me and we had a yummy cake cutting.

– For dinner we went out to Yellow Chili, the starters were great, everything else was ok..

We had quite a celebration 🙂


Thankfully today I don’t have to think about what to write!! Today is my birthday and I’ll write about it 🙂 Yes we are accepting wishes and gifts today 🙂

At my parents’ place birthdays have set rituals about them!! On birthdays, Shiro will be made in the morning. And any other sweet that the birthday girl/boy favored. On my birthday it was always Vedhami and Batakavada or patra!! Yeah the most important part of the birthday celebration was food!! And a new dress too!! Wearing a new dress too was part of birthday ritual!!

And in the evening, we would have friends over for celebration. Chips, cake and gulab jamn were the fixed part of the menu!! And we had Bhaji pao or chana puri as the main course!! Sometime Idli Sambar too featured on the menu!! Birthdays were very exciting days!! A lot wishes (& gifts) from everybody!! A license to act as a brat (nobody scolds you on your birthday 😉 ) and all the special treatment!! Ah, such joys!!

When hubby and I started dating, birthdays meant mushy cards and mushier gifts, I still have some of those gifts and all the cards with me!!

We also celebrated birthdays in office with cake, card and gift!! And of course I could leave for home early on that day!!

Did I say I love birthday?

But this time, the birthday is a little different!! I suddenly feel all grown up (No, I am not turning 30 this year). The day is just like any other day with regular chores!! And I don’t feel the need to do anything different!!

Probably I should make vedhami today…

So what is your birthday ritual like?

Meri RaamPyari…

First of all you go and listen this song and then come back to read this post..

Ok, you can’t go and listen to the song?! I’ll tell you who RaamPyari is… She is this car owned by Amitabh Bachhan, in the movie Akela.. She is more like a friend and companion to him in the movie…

So has been all my vehicles, hence they are called RaamPyari inspired by her!!

My first RaamPyari was red tricycle. And I have loads of photos of me riding it. It was a gift from my bua.  Though I don’t remember much about it, I am sure my mom must have loved it coz me riding it meant peace for mom!!

Then I outgrew it and it went on to become my brother’s raampyari.. Now I had my eyes on bigger things!! So my mom owned this old fashioned black cycle on which she went to office. Now I wanted this. So everytime I was asked to do some chore, I would negotiated this cycle ride. The fact that I couldn’t sit on the seat didn’t deter me from riding it. I refused to go to our helps’s place to call her without the cycle.

Looking at my love for the cycle (and probably to save mom’s cycle) I was gifted with a shiny new Hero Jet cycle!! After all I was a big girl studying in 4th standard now!! I was now entrusted with the responsibility of buying vegetables, this essentially meant that I was allowed to cross the road on my cycle!! And after 2 years, I started riding it to school!! All cool kids were supposed to ride to school on their cycles!! So all friends would ride together to school on their raampyaris and it was great fun!! With cycles at our disposal, we could now easily go to all the friends’ place. So, the days of meeting after school, studying together and of course gossiping started!! Then a didi who had started college passed on her BSA SLR (the coolest cycle) to me!! That was the end of my Hero Jet!!

And then, one year it became cool to own a scooty!! My parents were against me riding it to school and understandably so!! So, now I was riding to school with mom who had now got a Kinetic Honda!! Of course my eyes were on it now… And eventually my parents relented and I was allowed to ride it. This meant that all of us could easily go to movies and restaurants without worrying about buses and all!! Fun days, I tell you!!

I was given a TVS Scooty when the Kinetic Honda finally went out of service!! And that scooty stayed with me till I stayed in Ahmedabad!! Story of my college days are incomplete without it. The mandatory going out and hanging out with friends was done with the help of the trusted scooty. I also used to go home for lunch everyday as my college was near to my home!!

And when I started my first job, the scooty and I together discovered so many new areas of my city!! She went with me wherever I went!! I remember a rainy day, it had rained heavily which meant that I was required to report on duty. A lot of roads were water clogged, yet my scooty and I managed to reach on duty safely!! I have also had a lot of adventures with my scooty. Often I would forget to get it fueled and then it would protest by stopping on the way!! On many such occasions I was offered help by passing people. One night when returning from work the similar thing happened and I was pushing it to a nearest petrol pump when a couple passing on the bike helped me by pushing the scooty!! My parents have still not sold this scooty and it still can ferry me around if it has to and sometimes it does when I go to Ahmedabad!!

Do you have similar fond memories of your vehicles?

Tag Cloud